Chapter 10 explains how completes marriage, the wedding blessings and that accompany it, and the celebrations, timing, and preparation required for a wedding.
פרק י19 halachosSunday, September 6, 2026כ״ד באלול תשפ״ו◷ Estimated study time: 55–75 min
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An is forbidden to her husband by Rabbinic law for as long as she remains in her father’s home.
Although has already created a legally binding relationship between them, it has not yet permitted them to begin living together as husband and wife. That permission comes only with .
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A man who has relations with his in his father-in-law’s home is given .
The reference to his father-in-law’s home reflects the fact that she has not yet left her father’s household to enter married life with her husband. Relations at this stage violate the Sages’ requirement that the couple first complete .
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Even if he her through marital relations, he may not have relations with her a second time in her father’s home,
The first act established only . The method used to perform the does not eliminate the separate requirement of .
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until he brings her into his home, enters into privacy with her, and designates her exclusively for himself.
These actions demonstrate that she has left her father’s household and entered a new, private household with her husband. This transition marks the beginning of their life together as a fully married couple.
״״,
This entry into privacy is called “entering the ,”
״״.
and it is what is referred to throughout as .
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If, after consecrating his , a man has relations with her for the purpose of establishing ,
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he acquires her through as soon as the initial stage of marital relations occurs.
The legal transition does not require the completion of the act. Once marital relations have begun with the express purpose of establishing , the second stage of marriage takes effect.
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She thereby becomes a and is his wife in every respect.
The complete legal framework of marriage now applies. This includes the full rights and obligations associated with the and the other laws that depend upon the completion of .
Synopsis
An is legally bound to her husband through but may not yet live with him as his wife. Full marriage begins through or through relations expressly undertaken for the purpose of .
🔎Dig DeeperFrom to
From to
The connects this prohibition with the blessing recited before . That blessing describes the as forbidden to their husbands until they become permitted through and .
The ( 55:1) adds that before , the couple may not even remain alone together. Although has created a genuine marital bond, it does not yet permit the private life of marriage.
she becomes permitted to her husband for marital relations whenever he wishes,
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and she is his fully married wife in every respect.
The completes the second stage of marriage. The complete rights and obligations of husband and wife now apply, rather than only the legal bond created by .
—״״,
From the moment she enters the , she is called a ,
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even though marital relations have not taken place.
Unlike the final case of the preceding , here is completed through itself. Marital relations are therefore not required to establish her status as a .
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This applies provided that she is fit for marital relations at that time.
This qualification defines the type of that completes the marriage: the couple must enter a situation in which married life could lawfully begin.
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But if she was a ,
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then even though she entered the and he entered into privacy with her,
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the have not been completed, and she still has the status of an .
Because marital relations are forbidden while she is a , their privacy cannot yet represent the beginning of permitted married life. According to this ruling, the legal consequences that depend upon completed therefore do not yet take effect.
Synopsis
Ordinarily, makes an a fully married even before marital relations occur. According to the , however, does not complete while the woman is a .
🔎Dig DeeperWhen Completes the Marriage
When Completes the Marriage
and other authorities disagree with the and maintain that completes the marriage even when the bride is a , despite the fact that marital relations are presently forbidden. The and ( 61:1) discuss this position.
In practice, every effort is made to schedule a wedding when the bride will not be a . When that cannot be arranged, however, the wedding is still conducted and treated as binding, while marital relations must wait until she becomes permitted.
The wedding blessings must be recited in the groom’s home before the .
The reference to the groom’s home reflects the customary setting in which the wedding celebration was held. The essential requirement is that the blessings be recited before the marital bond is fully established through .
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There are six blessings, as follows:
״׳,״.
“Blessed are You, , our God, King of the universe, Who created everything for His glory.”
This blessing places the wedding celebration within the larger purpose of creation: everything that exists, including the new home now being established, ultimately serves ’s glory.
״׳,״.
“Blessed are You, , our God, King of the universe, Who forms the human being.”
This blessing praises for the creation of , the first human being.
״׳,,,
“Blessed are You, , our God, King of the universe, Who formed the human being in His image, in an image reflecting the form He designed,
The expression “in His image” does not describe a physical resemblance to . It refers to the distinctive spiritual capacities with which the human being was created.
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and prepared for him, from his own being, an everlasting structure.
The words “from his own being” refer to the creation of woman from . Their union also becomes an “everlasting structure” by allowing human life to continue through future generations.
׳,״.
Blessed are You, , Who forms the human being.”
״,.
“May the barren one rejoice exceedingly and exult when her children are gathered into her midst in joy.
“The barren one” refers to , bereft of many of her children during exile. Even at the height of a private wedding celebration, the Jewish people remember and pray for her restoration.
׳,״.
Blessed are You, , Who gladdens with her children.”
״,.
“Bring abundant joy to the beloved companions, as You brought joy to Your creation long ago in the Garden of Eden.
The “beloved companions” are the bride and groom. The blessing asks that they experience the unclouded happiness enjoyed by and before the first sin.
׳,״.
Blessed are You, , Who gladdens groom and bride.”
״׳,,,
“Blessed are You, , our God, King of the universe, Who created gladness and joy, groom and bride, rejoicing, song, delight and exultation, love and harmony, peace and friendship.
׳,
Soon, , our God, may there be heard in the cities of and in the streets of the sound of gladness, the sound of joy, the sound of a groom, and the sound of a bride;
The happiness of this couple is joined with the hope that complete joy will once again fill . The blessing connects the building of an individual Jewish home with the future restoration of the Jewish people as a whole.
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the sound of grooms rejoicing from their wedding canopies, and of young men from their feasts of song.
׳,״.
Blessed are You, , Who gladdens the groom together with the bride.”
Synopsis
Before , six blessings are recited that celebrate the creation of humanity, the bond between bride and groom, the rebuilding of , and the enduring joy of Jewish marriage.
🔎Dig DeeperThe Six Wedding Blessings
The Six Wedding Blessings
( 7b–8a) explains the progression of these blessings. “Who forms the human being” praises the creation of , while the following blessing expands upon the creation of woman from him and the enduring human structure created through their union.
Rashi also distinguishes between the conclusions of the final two blessings. “Who gladdens groom and bride” asks that the couple enjoy lasting happiness and success together. “Who gladdens the groom together with the bride” emphasizes the joy they find in one another and prays that the happiness of their wedding continue throughout their lives.
( 8a) addresses why the longer blessing beginning “Who formed the human being in His image” opens with “Blessed are You” even though it follows the preceding blessings. Because those blessings are brief, omitting a new opening could make them appear to be parts of a single blessing rather than distinct blessings.
a cup of wine is brought, and the blessing over the wine is recited first.
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He then recites all the wedding blessings over that cup,
The cup of wine accompanies the complete series of blessings. The blessing over the wine is followed by the six wedding blessings listed in the preceding .
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so that he recites a total of seven blessings.
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In some places, the custom was to bring a myrtle branch together with the wine.
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The blessing over the myrtle was recited after the blessing over the wine,
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and the six wedding blessings were then recited.
The blessing over the myrtle was an additional local custom. It did not replace or alter any of the six wedding blessings.
Synopsis
When wine is available, its blessing is recited before the six wedding blessings, producing the group known as the Seven Blessings. Some communities also recited a blessing over myrtle between the wine and the wedding blessings.
🔎Dig DeeperCompleting the Seven Wedding Blessings
Completing the Seven Wedding Blessings
The states in 2:9–11 that these seven blessings are also recited after at qualifying festive meals held during the seven days following the wedding. Thus, the blessings accompany not only the establishment of the marriage but also the continued celebration of the newly married couple.
“Adult” here means a Jewish male who has reached majority—thirteen years and one day, together with the signs of physical maturity. In the legal setting described by the , “free men” excludes servants, who did not possess the personal legal status required for this quorum.
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and the groom may be counted as one of the ten.
The requirement is for ten men in total, not ten guests in addition to the groom.
Synopsis
The wedding blessings require a of ten adult Jewish men, and the groom is included in that number.
🔎Dig DeeperThe Required for the Wedding Blessings
The Required for the Wedding Blessings
7b derives the requirement of ten from 4:2, where gathered ten elders in connection with his marriage to .
In the (III:49), the explains that the Sages required ten men in order to publicize the marriage. Married life was to begin only after the relationship had been formally established before the community, preventing a couple from living together without a publicly recognized marriage.
If a man consecrates a woman and recites the wedding blessings,
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but does not enter into privacy with her in his home,
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she remains an .
The blessings alone do not change her legal status. Although they were recited in anticipation of the marriage, the act that establishes has not yet occurred.
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For the wedding blessings do not create the ;
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rather, is created by entering the .
This distinguishes the blessings that accompany the wedding from the legal act that completes the marriage. The blessings sanctify the occasion, but is what changes the woman’s status from an to a .
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If he performed and brought her into the ,
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but did not recite the wedding blessings,
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she is nevertheless fully married,
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and he subsequently recites the blessings, even if several days have passed.
Since has already occurred, the marriage is valid and complete. The omitted blessings must still be recited, but their absence does not undo or delay the .
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A woman who is a should not enter until she becomes purified.
As explained in Halachah 2, according to the , does not fully complete when the woman is not presently permitted for marital relations.
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The wedding blessings should not be recited for her until she becomes purified.
The blessings are meant to accompany the establishment of . They should therefore be delayed until a complete can take place.
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If he transgressed, entered with her, and recited the blessings,
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he does not recite the blessings again.
Although the blessings were recited at an improper time, they are not treated as though they were never said. They are therefore not repeated after she becomes purified.
Synopsis
establishes ; the wedding blessings do not. Consequently, completes the marriage even if the blessings were omitted, and those blessings are subsequently recited.
🔎Dig Deeper—not the Blessings—Completes
—not the Blessings—Completes
As discussed in connection with Halachah 2, and other authorities maintain that can complete the marriage even when the bride is a . Accordingly, present practice is to make every effort to schedule the wedding when she will not be a , but the wedding may still be held if this cannot be arranged. The blessings are recited and are not repeated later, while marital relations must wait until she becomes purified.
A man must write a for his wife before she enters the ,
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and only afterward may he have marital relations with his wife.
The couple may not begin married life without the financial protection that the provides.
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The groom pays the scribe’s fee.
Because the records the husband’s obligation to his wife, the expense of preparing the document rests upon him.
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How much must he obligate himself to pay her?
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If she was a virgin, the may not provide for less than two hundred .
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If she had previously had marital relations, it may not provide for less than one hundred .
These are minimum obligations. The wording “may not provide for less” means that the required amount cannot be reduced, although the husband may voluntarily undertake a larger obligation.
The ( 8:8) notes that one hundred represented the amount considered sufficient to support a person for one year.
״״.
This is called the fundamental obligation of the .
This is the minimum amount established by law, as distinct from any additional amount that the husband voluntarily undertakes.
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If he wishes to add to her obligation—even as much as a of gold—he may do so.
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The additional amount and the fundamental obligation are governed by the same laws in most respects.
Once the husband formally adds an amount to the , it becomes a binding part of his obligation rather than an informal promise.
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Therefore, whenever the term “” is used without qualification,
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it includes the fundamental obligation and the additional amount together.
A later ruling that refers simply to the ordinarily applies to the entire financial obligation recorded in it, not only to the required minimum.
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It was the Sages who instituted the for a woman,
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so that it would not be a light matter in her husband’s eyes to divorce her.
The financial obligation gives the husband reason to pause before ending the marriage. The therefore protects the stability of the marriage in addition to protecting the wife financially if the marriage ends.
Synopsis
A husband must provide a before marital relations are permitted. It must contain the minimum obligation established by the Sages, although he may add any amount he chooses; an unqualified reference to the generally includes both amounts.
🔎Dig DeeperThe ’s Required and Additional Obligations
The ’s Required and Additional Obligations
The states that the Sages instituted the fundamental obligation. maintains instead that its fundamental obligation originates in law. Most authorities, including , agree with the Rambam that the obligation is Rabbinic.
Many nevertheless describe the two hundred silver as an amount “due to you according to the .” According to many authorities, this wording identifies the type and value of silver being promised; it does not necessarily mean that the obligation itself is of origin.
The Sages did not establish these as coins of pure silver.
“These ” are the two hundred or one hundred required for the fundamental obligation described in the preceding .
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Rather, they referred to the coinage used in those days,
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which consisted of seven parts copper and one part silver,
Only one eighth of the coin’s material was silver. The face value of the required must therefore be distinguished from the amount of pure silver they actually contained.
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so that a contained half a of silver.
◇A helpful concept
A was worth four . Since this coinage was one-eighth silver, a with a face value of four contained only one-half —or one-half —of actual silver.
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It follows that the two hundred owed to a virgin
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contained twenty-five of pure silver,
Because only one eighth of the stated amount was silver, two hundred of this mixed coinage contained the equivalent of twenty-five pure-silver .
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while the one hundred owed to a woman who had previously had marital relations contained twelve and a half of pure silver.
Her required amount was half that of a virgin, both in the face value of the coins and in their actual silver content.
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The weight of each is ninety-six barley grains,
Barley grains provide a defined standard by which the required weight of silver can be measured.
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as we explained at the beginning of .
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A is what is called a throughout,
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whether it consisted of pure silver or of the coinage used in those days.
The terms and identify the same denomination. The amount of actual silver, however, depends upon whether the discussion concerns a pure-silver coin or the mixed coinage used in the Talmudic period.
Synopsis
The calculates the fundamental according to the mixed coinage used in the Talmudic period, which was one-eighth silver. Two hundred therefore contained twenty-five of pure silver, while one hundred contained twelve and a half.
🔎Dig DeeperCalculating the Silver Value of the
Calculating the Silver Value of the
The and ( 66:6) record the view that the two hundred owed to a virgin are calculated as pure silver rather than as the mixed coinage described by the . Regarding a bride who was not a virgin, these authorities calculate the obligation using one hundred of the Talmudic coinage. In practice, the (66:14) records the custom of assigning her half the amount given to a virgin.
Regarding the weight of a , most authorities calculate its contemporary equivalent as approximately 4.8 grams. , in his , calculates it as approximately 5.1 grams.
Sources: Tur and Rama, 66:6; Beit Shmuel 66:14; Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi,
The of a virgin may not be set below two hundred, nor that of a woman who has had marital relations below one hundred.
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If anyone sets it below that amount, his marital relations are regarded as promiscuous relations.
This does not mean that the marriage is invalid. Rather, because the wife lacks the minimum financial security established by the Sages, the couple may not live together as husband and wife.
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Whether he records the in a written document,
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or testify that he undertook an obligation to her for one hundred or two hundred through a formal act of acquisition—
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he is permitted to live with her.
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Similarly, if he gave her movable property equal in value to her ,
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he is permitted to have marital relations with her,
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until they have an opportunity to prepare the written .
The property provides temporary security for the obligation. It is not intended to replace the document permanently; the should be written as soon as circumstances allow.
Synopsis
The minimum obligation must be legally secured before the couple may live together. A written document is not the only valid means: a witnessed, formally binding undertaking or temporary security of equal value also suffices.
🔎Dig DeeperSecuring the Without a Written Document
Securing the Without a Written Document
The ( 66:2) emphasizes that giving movable property as security is only a temporary arrangement. A written must be prepared at the earliest opportunity.
If a man married a woman without writing a for her,
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or he wrote one but the document was lost,
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or she waived her in favor of her husband,
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or sold her to him,
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he must write a new document obligating himself for the fundamental amount if he wishes to remain married to her,
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because a man may not remain with his wife for even a single hour without a .
In each of these cases, the protection created by the is absent: either no document exists, or the wife has released or returned the obligation to her husband. If the marriage is to continue, he must restore at least the minimum obligation established by the Sages.
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However, if she sells her to others for its present benefit,
◇A helpful concept
Selling a for its present benefit means selling its uncertain future collection rights for a smaller amount paid now. The purchaser will collect the if the husband later dies or divorces her, but receives nothing if she dies first.
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he need not write another for her;
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for the Sages instituted the only so that it would not be easy in his eyes to divorce her.
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If this husband divorces her, he pays the to the purchaser,
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just as he would have paid it to her had she not sold it.
The debt remains in force even though another person now owns the right to collect it. Divorce therefore remains financially consequential for the husband, so the purpose of the has not been lost.
Synopsis
If the obligation is absent, lost, waived, or sold back to the husband, he must restore at least its fundamental amount before continuing the marriage. If the wife sells the collection rights to someone else, no replacement is needed because the husband’s financial obligation remains intact.
🔎Dig DeeperWhen a Is Lost, Waived, or Sold
When a Is Lost, Waived, or Sold
The ( 66:10) questions whether the replacement in this situation must obligate the husband for one hundred or two hundred . The ’s central ruling is that the fundamental obligation must be restored; the precise minimum in this case requires further determination.
The records financial obligations; it does not itself advance the marriage from to . That change of status occurs through entry into the .
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If he died or divorced her,
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she collects the fundamental amount of her from property that remains in his or his estate’s possession.
Here, “unencumbered property” means property still held by the husband or his estate, rather than property he previously sold. Because had not yet taken place, her right of collection does not extend to property transferred to purchasers.
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She does not collect any of the additional amount,
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since she had not entered the .
The voluntarily added sum was promised in anticipation of the completed marriage. Since the couple never reached , she does not acquire that additional payment.
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But if he her and did not write a ,
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and he died or divorced her while she was an ,
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she receives nothing, not even the fundamental amount,
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because the Sages did not grant her the fundamental amount until she enters or until he gives her a written obligation.
Thus, before , the fundamental amount becomes collectible only if the husband actually wrote a . alone does not create that monetary right.
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If a father consecrates his daughter,
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and the man who her wrote a for her,
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and he died or divorced her while she was a ,
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her belongs to her father, as we have explained.
Because she is still a under her father’s legal authority and he arranged her , the payment arising during that period is paid to him.
Synopsis
Writing a does not create . An for whom one was written may collect its fundamental amount from unencumbered property if the man dies or divorces her, but she does not collect the additional amount. Without a written , an receives nothing.
🔎Dig DeeperWhat an May Collect from Her
What an May Collect from Her
and disagree with the regarding collection from property that the husband sold, maintaining that an whose was written may collect from that property as well. The ( 55:6) follows the Rambam.
Rabbenu Asher also maintains that a woman is entitled to the fundamental amount from onward even when no was written. The records the Rambam’s position, and although the cites Rabbenu Asher’s view, he states that accepted practice follows the Rambam.
Sources:43b, 54b; Rabbenu Asher; Rabbenu Nissim; and Rama, 55:6
that anyone who marries a virgin must celebrate with her for seven days—
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he does not engage in his work,
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nor conduct business in the marketplace,
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but instead eats, drinks, and rejoices,
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whether he had never married or was a widower.
The required period is determined here by the bride’s status, not by the groom’s previous marital history.
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If she had previously had marital relations,
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the celebration may not be fewer than three days.
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For it is an ordinance of the Sages for the daughters of Israel
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that a husband rejoice with a virgin for seven days,
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and with a woman who has previously had marital relations for three days,
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whether he had never married or was a widower.
Synopsis
A husband devotes seven days of celebration to a virgin bride and at least three days to a bride who has previously had marital relations, regardless of whether he himself was previously married.
🔎Dig DeeperThe Required Days of Wedding Celebration
The Required Days of Wedding Celebration
The understands that when a man who has never married weds a woman who was previously married, he celebrates with her for seven days. He supports this from 2:9, which provides that the seven wedding blessings are recited throughout that week.
A man may marry several women together on a single day,
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and recite the wedding blessings for all of them together.
One recitation may serve all the marriages because the blessings can encompass several brides at the same ceremony.
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With regard to the celebration, however,
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he must rejoice with each woman individually for the period appropriate to her—
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seven days if she is a virgin,
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and three days if she has previously had marital relations;
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one celebration may not be combined with another.
Each bride is entitled to a distinct period of the groom’s attention and rejoicing. Thus, two virgin brides require fourteen successive days of celebration, while a virgin and a bride who has previously had marital relations require ten.
Synopsis
Several weddings and their blessings may take place together, but each bride must receive her own full, separate period of celebration.
Here, refers to , the first stage of marriage. Even the mourning of does not prohibit , because delaying could allow another man to the woman first.
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A wedding, however, may not be held on Friday or Sunday—
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a decree intended to prevent preparation of the feast from leading to desecration of ,
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because the groom is preoccupied with his wedding feast.
A Friday wedding could lead to last-minute preparations continuing into . A Sunday wedding presents the corresponding concern that, in his preoccupation with the feast, the groom might begin preparing on .
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It goes without saying that it is forbidden to marry on itself.
In addition to the concern about preparing the feast, establish legally binding marital rights. Establishing such an acquisition is forbidden on .
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Even on , weddings are not held, as we have explained—
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because one celebration may not be combined with another,
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as it is stated: “Complete the week of this one, and then this one too will be given to you” (Genesis 29:27).
instructed to complete the seven-day celebration for before marrying . This teaches that each occasion of joy should receive its own attention. A wedding is therefore not held during the festival rejoicing of .
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On the remaining days, a man may marry on whichever day he wishes—
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provided that he devotes the three days before the wedding to preparing the wedding feast.
The wedding is not otherwise restricted to a particular weekday, but its feast may not be treated casually. Three days must be devoted beforehand to preparing it.
Synopsis
may take place on any weekday, including . Weddings may not be held on or , and the also excludes Friday and Sunday because of possible desecration. On other days, a wedding may be held after three days of preparation.
🔎Dig DeeperWhen and Weddings May Be Held
When and Weddings May Be Held
The ( 64:3), following the , records that the established practice in later generations permits weddings on Friday, provided that the groom devotes three days to preparing the feast.
This practice also permits weddings on Sunday or Monday. The intervening does not prevent the preceding days from counting toward the required period of preparation.
Wedding Days Chosen for Court Access and Celebration
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In a place where the court sits only on Monday and Thursday,
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a virgin is married on Wednesday—
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so that if the husband has a claim concerning her virginity, he can go to court early the following morning.
A Wednesday wedding places the next court session immediately after the wedding night. If the husband discovers grounds for a claim, he can bring the matter before the judges while the facts and his concern are still fresh.
◇A helpful concept
A “claim concerning her virginity” means that the husband asserts that the physical indications he expected to find were absent. In the circumstances addressed by the Sages, this could raise a serious question about conduct occurring after . Immediate access to the court ensured that the matter would be investigated.
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It is the practice instituted by the Sages
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that one who marries a woman who has previously had marital relations should marry her on Thursday,
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so that he will rejoice with her on Thursday, Friday, and ,
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and return to his work on Sunday.
As established above, this bride is entitled to three days of celebration. Scheduling the wedding for Thursday naturally provides all three days before the groom returns to work.
Synopsis
Where courts convene only on Monday and Thursday, a virgin marries on Wednesday so that any claim may be brought promptly. A bride who has previously had marital relations marries on Thursday so that the groom will devote three consecutive days to celebrating with her.
🔎Dig DeeperWedding Days Chosen for Court Access and Celebration
Wedding Days Chosen for Court Access and Celebration
( 2a) explains that the Sages wanted a claim concerning the bride’s virginity brought promptly before the court. They were concerned that if the husband had to wait, the bride might soothe his anger and he might abandon a claim that could have serious consequences.
Rashi also explains the Thursday wedding practice. When both spouses had been married previously, the wedding blessings were recited for only one day. The Sages therefore arranged the wedding for Thursday so that the groom would not immediately return to work and neglect the bride’s required celebration.
so that she will not marry until she grows older and becomes a .
Although her father had the legal authority to arrange her while she was a minor, neither she nor her father must allow to proceed immediately. Either one may insist that the marriage wait until she reaches the stage of .
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But if they consent and he brings her into marriage, he may do so;
The girl and her father possess the right to delay the wedding. If the husband pressures the girl into agreeing and the wedding nevertheless proceeds, the are legally binding. That legal validity does not make his conduct proper, as the next phrase makes clear.
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nevertheless, it is not proper to act this way.
Legal validity does not make the course appropriate. The father should wait until his daughter is old enough to make a willing and informed choice about marrying her intended husband.
Synopsis
Both a minor bride and her father may postpone until she becomes a . If the wedding nevertheless proceeds with her agreement, the marriage is binding, but arranging her marriage at such a young age is improper.
If a man her, waited several years, and then requested that she enter ,
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and she is now a —
she is given twelve months from the day of his request
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to provide for herself and prepare what she needs for him,
and afterward she marries.
The years that passed after the do not count as preparation time when the groom had not yet requested the wedding. Her twelve months begin with his request, allowing her to obtain the clothing, jewelry, and other necessities needed for marriage.
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If he requested the wedding after she became a ,
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she is given twelve months calculated from the day she attained .
In this case, the twelve-month calculation begins with , rather than with his later request. Accordingly, the time that has already passed since she became a counts toward her preparation period; she does not necessarily receive twelve new months from the date of the request.
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Similarly, if he her on the day she attained ,
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she is given twelve months from the day of the ,
which is the day she attained .
Here the two possible starting points coincide: she became a and was on the same day. Her twelve-month preparation period therefore begins on that date.
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If he her after she had attained —
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if twelve months of her had already passed,
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and she was afterward,
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she is given only thirty days from the day he requests the wedding.
Because she had already been an adult for a full year before the , she is presumed to have had substantial opportunity to prepare. She therefore receives only thirty additional days once the groom requests the wedding.
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Similarly, if a man consecrates a woman who has previously had marital relations,
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she is given thirty days from the day he requests the wedding.
This ruling concerns a widow who had already prepared for an earlier marriage. Since she does not require the same extended period of first-time preparation, thirty days are sufficient.
Synopsis
A ordinarily receives twelve months from the groom’s request to prepare for marriage. For a , the calculation begins from ; if she had already been a for twelve months before , she receives thirty days from the request. A woman who has previously had marital relations likewise receives thirty days.
🔎Dig DeeperThe Bride’s Time to Prepare for Marriage
The Bride’s Time to Prepare for Marriage
The explains that the final case concerns a widow who is now . Since she already prepared herself for her first marriage, she is given only thirty days.
He explains that the uses the broader expression “a woman who has previously had marital relations” to exclude a woman whose first husband died after but before . Since she never actually entered marriage, she still requires the longer preparation period.
Just as a woman is given time from when the groom requests the wedding
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to provide for herself before she marries—
so too a man is given time to provide for himself
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from when the woman requests that he proceed with the wedding.
The obligation to prepare is mutual. The groom may need time to arrange the wedding celebration and prepare a home and furnishings, just as the bride needs time to obtain what she requires.
?
How much time is he given?
:
The same amount that would be given to her:
,;
if she would receive twelve months, he receives twelve months;
,.
and if she would receive thirty days, he receives thirty days.
According to the , the groom’s allotted time follows the bride’s category. Her status determines whether both parties receive a preparation period of twelve months or thirty days.
Synopsis
When the bride requests that the wedding proceed, the groom is also entitled to preparation time. According to the , he receives the same twelve-month or thirty-day period that would have been granted to her.
🔎Dig DeeperThe Groom Also Receives Time to Prepare
The Groom Also Receives Time to Prepare
The understands the to make the bride’s status decisive: if she would receive twelve months, so does the groom; if she would receive thirty days, so does he.
The ( 5:3) instead makes the groom’s own status decisive. A man who has never married receives twelve months, while a widower receives thirty days. The ( 56) follows this position.
When a Delayed Wedding Creates a Support Obligation
—
If the preparation period granted to the man ended and he had not married her—
,
he becomes obligated to provide her sustenance,
.
even though he has not yet brought her into marriage.
Ordinarily, a husband’s obligation to support his wife begins with . Here, however, the wedding was delayed beyond the time allotted to the groom. Since the bride was prepared to marry and the remaining delay is attributable to him, he must begin supporting her even though have not yet taken place.
—
But if the allotted period ended on Sunday or Friday—
,
he is not required to provide her sustenance for that day,
.
because he is unable to marry her then.
As stated in Halachah 14, according to the a wedding may not be held on Friday or Sunday because its preparations could lead to the desecration of . Since the groom is prevented from marrying her on that day, the delay is not attributed to him.
This exception applies only to the day on which the wedding cannot be held. It does not give him a new preparation period. Once marriage becomes possible, an additional delay for which he is responsible creates the obligation to support her.
,
Similarly, if either he or she became ill,
—
or she entered the state when the allotted period ended—
;
he is not required to provide her sustenance;
,
for she is not fit to marry until she becomes purified or recovers,
.
and similarly, he cannot marry a woman until he recovers.
The support obligation arises only when the groom could have completed the marriage but failed to do so. If illness prevents either party from marrying, or if the bride is a —which, according to the ’s ruling in Halachah 2, prevents the completion of —the delay results from circumstances beyond their control.
The exemption continues only while that impediment remains. Once the bride is purified or the ill party recovers, the wedding can proceed and the ordinary consequences of any further delay apply.
Synopsis
Once the groom’s preparation period ends, he must support his even before if he is responsible for the delay. The obligation is postponed while the wedding is prevented by the day on which the deadline falls, the illness of either party, or the bride’s state.
🔎Dig DeeperWhen a Delayed Wedding Creates a Support Obligation
When a Delayed Wedding Creates a Support Obligation
The ( 56:3) distinguishes between an unavoidable impediment that exists when the preparation period ends and one that arises after the groom has already become obligated.
If the groom first delays the wedding voluntarily and thereby becomes responsible for supporting his , a subsequent illness of the bride does not end that existing obligation, even though the wedding must now be postponed.
Translation and elucidation: Independently prepared for Rambam, Clearly in contemporary English. Translation follows the Rambam’s words; elucidation supplies only the context needed to understand them.
Word cards and glossary: Hebrew word cards distinguish a word’s basic meaning from its meaning in the particular phrase. Shared glossary entries explain recurring terms; biography entries identify the cited authorities.
Explain and Background: Explain provides context needed for the ruling. Optional Background panels provide additional context that can be skipped without losing the essential explanation.
Synopsis: A short summary follows each halachah. It is a guide to the central ruling, not a replacement for the full text and its qualifications.
Dig Deeper: Based on the classic commentaries named inside each panel. Editorial explanations are not presented as quotations.
Live It: Where present, these panels connect a particular halachah to a suggested personal reflection and an action to try. Original applications are labeled as suggested reflections. They are distinct from the ruling and are not attributed to the Rebbe merely because his guidance supports seeking a practical lesson.
Measurements: Modern equivalents draw on Chabad.org’s measurement glossary and cited halachic calculations. They show a range when major accepted calculations differ. Monetary equivalents fluctuate with the price of silver.
The Rebbe’s teachings and guidance: Source links accompany the completion teachings and the guidance inside Dig Deeper and Live It. Quotations, translations, and adaptations are identified; the general guidance is separate from the sources for a panel’s particular discussion.
Editorial responsibility: Created and prepared for this project by Levi Gelb. Corrections and suggestions can be submitted below. This presentation supports learning; practical halachic questions should be brought to a qualified rav.
Chapter 10 at a glance
How a marriage becomes complete
This chapter moves from the legal bond of to the full framework of married life, including , blessings, financial protection, celebration, and preparation.
creates a binding relationship, but married life begins only after through .
The wedding blessings accompany the marriage but do not themselves complete it.
The protects the wife through a binding financial obligation and must remain in force throughout the marriage.
Wedding celebrations and their timing are regulated so that each marriage receives its proper attention.
Bride and groom receive defined periods to prepare, with support obligations beginning when an avoidable delay continues beyond that time.
פרק י
End of chapter.
You have reached the end of all nineteen halachos.